Last time I cried, I was all
drenched with tears and sweat that I could hardly breathe. I was so caught up
with the moment that I was lost for rationale and more so of the presence of
time. I was quiet slumped and sulking over a bountiful spill that I have not
been aware of my personal needs. All I could think of was how to put my aching
heart to rest.
I know crying my eyes off won’t
help me get by, more so, surpass the ordeal. I need to control myself, though I
am trying, still to no avail. I cannot stop even if I want to. Of the days that
I kept things to myself, I would end up sleeping after a tearful session. By
the time I wake up, I would be all sore and weary of the world around me.
Admittedly, I was feeling sorry
for myself. I was not enjoying the moment, as I was not in motion. I remained
stagnated and stuck. Although I have wanted to move on, I cannot seem to do so as
I feel if I move, I would still revert back to my old place. It was as if I was
tied to the hip with the situation.
However, as days turned into
weeks, I learned to let go. It was like waking up with less baggage every
single day. As if the tears took my pain with every drop coming out from my
eyes. The more I cried, the more I appreciate my life and my being. Admittedly,
it was like magic. It was never planned as I was getting tired of crying but
every time I hold onto my present and think of my future, my past seems to pull
me back.
It was hard. No, let me correct
that. It was difficult. I was having a whirlwind of emotional distress that I
was not in control of my existence, being and self. My life seemed to pass by
without me knowing of it. I was lost in the woods and was waiting for the big
bad wolf to come pick me up. It was like I lost all my sanity and rationality
along with the tears. I know, this too shall pass but of its expected time of
departure, I do not know.
Deep inside I was hoping and
wishing for it to happen. That one day, my sun would shine and take all the
clouds away. Although, I know it would not happen in a snap, I know it will. And
eventually it did.
Along the way to recovery, I
learned of control and of discipline. I am one to say that I have not been able
to learn to control myself that’s why I ended up depressed and more so, I was
so caught up with the moment that discipline became a wallpaper in the
background. However, after what I have been through, I was fortunate enough to
learn of the importance of such in the self.
How, you might ask? Well, it was
because of Neuro Linguistic Programming and Time Line Therapy ®, NLP and TLT
respectively. Intrigued? I believe so. Before you get slumped in a traumatic
situation and lost in it, learn NLP and TLT to have the life that you have
always wanted – despite the challenges in it.
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